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Random thoughts at night, A silent kill

How life has changed... from eagerly waiting to be loved to be desperate of finding someone to love! What has happened to the love of my life? Some thoughts literally pierce my heart like a knife! I always had the attention of my father Until I married this Man,  This Man who was more than everything else but has time changed or just my thoughts rather? Where are the days when someone admired me I now lost my voice, my soul still alive Deep inside is a cry which only I hear No i don't want to cry aloud, My children are still asleep That moment when i see them sleep This moment is the most peaceful one For a moment I have no other thought And then this insecure moment starts creeping in What happened to the man, who gave me all joy Now i have none to share my pain We find each other so different so different from what i have seen has it something to do with time or will time change this presumed notion I have umpteen though